Sunday, September 2, 2012


There's something psychological about a due date that makes you feel, once it's come and gone, that you're in a straight jacket.

Of course that is unless you're one of *those* moms who feel great during pregnancy. One of those moms who "glowed." Well...not I. Though I certainly wish that was the case. I'm fully aware of the wonderful miracle that is taking place and the brand new human who will be here (not) soon (enough). But he needs to be miracling in his bassinet now, not my belly. I'm ready for that transition.

As it is I wake up feeling like I spent the night being beaten up. My back is a joke - my ability to stand upright is progressively declining. My ability to smile it away when people ask how I'm doing -- oh and the "are you still pregnant!?" and "are you sure it's just one?!" -- is rapidly disappearing.

Proceed at your own risk.

Swelling: check (ever-present, no reprieve)

Numbness/carpel tunnel: check (though wearing the splint at night helps the pain)

Sleep: fitful, restless. And when I wake up, pure suffering for a few hours as I reacquaint myself with being awake.

Breathing: shallow at best.

Attitude: getting worse by the day.

Hospital bags: packed a month ago.

Baby's room: ready for baby!!

Photo: me at 40 weeks, 08.31.12

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Just Around the Corner

About a week from now, we'll have our baby here.

I went to the doctor for my weekly appointment this Tuesday and he said if we don't have a baby by my next appointment (Wednesday, 8/29) then we'll discuss inducing. Which we'll likely schedule for our due date, Friday, August 31st.

38 weeks [08.17.12]

So I imagine I'll be spending Labor Day weekend in the hospital for a couple days with a brand new little boy.

I'm trying to go into the entire process - labor and delivery, parenthood - as open and blank as possible. So many people are so very eager to toss their 2 coins into the fountain of advice surrounding all new parents. A fountain we most definitely did not build and did not ask to be filled with 2 cents after 2 cents worth of advice that perhaps worked for you.

There is so much information that is in conflict with a majority of the other sources of information out there that I would rather just have a basic understanding of what I've gotten myself into and then do it the way that works for me and for Kevin. I promise, we've done 99% of the grown up, adult stuff of life for the last 7 years entirely on our own. I'm sure we'll manage.

Dinner with Kevin, full term/37 weeks. [08.10.12]
 At the same time there is still a feeling of weightlessness as we dive slowly into the unknown territory of parenthood. No matter how many people think they are helping with their tips and tricks, we are still the ones who will be living the new reality of a tiny, new boy in our house who needs us for everything. And he is not your boy. You are not me. Our circumstance will be entirely different from all the new babies out there. It will be specific to us. There will always be an element of 'winging it'.

Pretty flannel blanket from Grandma H.
 Everything is as ready as it can be. I want to vacuum (again); finish the laundry (it's never finished!), wash some more dishes. The dog needs a bath and the guest room needs to be organized. I picture myself living in dusty, un-vacuumed squalor the first weeks of his life feeling, not only the weight of managing a new life but doing so with crumbs of cat litter underfoot, unwashed dishes in the sink. What an unpleasant thought!

But I know I have a handful of people who are genuinely willing to help. They don't proffer advice like a vending machine, like a broken record. They actually care about me and Kevin and our little boy. Those are the very select few people who will be a relief to have around as needed. To make a meal or wash a dish. Or sweep up cat litter.

For now we just wait! To see when this guy decides to come. Whether he comes this week or we induce, Kevin and I will have our little boy here by August 31st.

Eight. Days. Left.

Sunday, August 12, 2012

This is what full term feels like...

This past Friday I was a full 37 weeks. Full term and due in just a few more weeks. Though he could come at any time!

Here's how I've been feeling lately...

Sleep: spotty. When I do sleep its heavy and I wake up with aches and pains everywhere.

Carpel tunnel: worse than ever. I have inflammation in my hands that makes my fingers arthritis-stuff and painful in the mornings. I'm wearing a wrist brace on my right wrist to help keep the shooting pains at bay.

Feet (and ankles and legs): the swelling is never going away. I'm convinced. For a while it was bad all day everyday, even straight out of bed. The last couple of days it seems like the swelling is better when I wake up but by the end of the day it's back: elephant legs. :/

Back: my back pain has gone from mild and irksome to intense and inescapable. Now concentrated in my lower back, I can't sit or stand or bend or turn without it hurting. If I sit "too long", it hurts. If I walk around "too long", it hurts. My pelvis and lower back are in constant pain. UGH.

Baby: baby boy is still moving a lot and excels at restricting my lung capacity. His little feet are stationed under my ribs on the right side, his bottom in the middle of my belly and his head, straight down in my pelvis. When he hiccups my whole belly shakes like a big bowl of jell-o. And when he kicks, sometimes it tickles and sometimes it really hurts, depending on where exactly his feet are in relation to my ribs.

Gracefulness: out the window a long time ago. Getting out of bed means rolling over slowly (so as not to set off the almost cripling sharp lower-abdominal pain) and then pushing myself into a sitting position and then standing...on achy feet. The soles of my feet have a funny sensation whenever they touch the floor.

Wedding ring: haven't been able to wear it in about 6 weeks. I thought about going Frodo and wearing it on a chain but I just haven't gotten around to it.

In brighter news....

Baby (health): the baby is doing great. He's been head down for at least 3 weeks now and at this point the Dr said its unlikely he'll turn. His heart rate is lovely and strong. And apparently he could be quite large. I'm going to see if we can get a birth weight estimate at my next appointment. I know it depends on when he decides to show up but ... Just an idea of what I'm facing would be great. ;)

Nursery: his room is done. It needs stuff on the walls and it needs a changing pad. But it's done enough for me. And it's the nicest room in the house. And comfortable. And quiet. And pretty. I'm pleased.

Pretty new flannel blanket from Grandma H:

Little basket of toys and stuffed animals:

Hospital bags: packed last week. Mine and baby's. Though that reminds me, Kevin may need one, too. Though I want him to go home - if he wants - so he can get some sleep in our bed and not a hospital room.

Hospital tour: done. We know where to go and what to do if we go into labor anytime day or night.

Stroller: purchased! We spent a long evening with an awesome BuyBuyBaby employee last week and were schooled on all things stroller. The one I "knew" I wanted from my online research ended up not being the one I wanted after test driving. Which is why you should always try out a stroller in person before buying it. Always. So we talked about every stroller in the store, pushes around about 1/2 a dozen after narrowing down our choices and decided on the Baby Jogger City Mini.

We like all the features. Kevin and I both felt comfortable pushing it (handle is not height-adjustable like some but was a comfortable height for us and padded) and loved the compact turning radius. With the 3-wheel design it is so easy to navigate. Plus the easy one-handle fold was enough to woo us: you just lift a handle in the seat and the stroller folds in on itself. It makes a nice flat fold to fit in the car easily. Its reclines nearly flat for newborns or sleepy 2 year olds and has a 50 pound capacity. The sun canopy is crazy huge with like 4 different settings and 2 windows so you can check on baby easily. We got the Chicco car seat adaptor as well and easily snapped it onto the stroller. Even with the added weight it's still a breeze to get around. Can't wait for Bebe to give it a try. :)

Stretch marks: none. Been moisturizing like mad (Nivea is awesome!)

Baby shower news: My sweet co-workers threw me a surprise baby shower last week. I walked in to what I thought was a business lunch and found instead a baby shower: decorations, huge cake, catered lunch, gifts. What a surprise!! We had such a lovely time. I was so overwhelmed at first ... Such a sweet gesture. My guys were in in it too and had gotten gifts even though they weren't there to have lunch with us.

Jennifer's baby shower on the 4th was a hit. The food and cake were ridiculous. We had a great turn out and everyone enjoyed themselves. Just an awesome afternoon overall.

Next weekend we have a barbecue shower at my parents' house and then we are done.

I certainly hadn't planned on 4 baby showers but am so honored that people want to host these events for Kevin and me and Little Man. I've certainly enjoyed the experience.

Jennifer and me at her fabulous shower:

Me and the cake!

Erika and me at the shower:

Surprise baby shower at the office!

Meredith's baby shower at Chocolate Angel, July:

Yummy mini cakes:

My mom and me at Chocolate Angel:

Thursday, July 26, 2012

35 weeks. 35 days to go.

Today marks the completion of my 35th week and the last 35 days of my pregnancy. The first several months went so slowly; I think I judged my progress on whether or not - or how much - I was showing. Once I started showing - around 4 months I think? - it started going faster. It's just a physical way to assess the progress I suppose and makes it feel like its going by faster? The last couple months in particular have flown.

I've felt so huge and clumsy, tired and achy and crampy. But I've been excited and happy about the "big day" getting closer and closer. It's been something of a roller coaster, emotionally. From day to day I am thrilled (yay! My own sweet little boy to take care of!) and then scared shitless (I'm going to be a mom! What was I thinking?!).

It's a good thing there are 9 months to get ready. All the back and forth has finally stabilized and I feel ready. I'm confident and happy and almost completely ready for a new little human to live in my house.

He has a beautiful bedroom waiting for him and a pretty bed and comfy clothes and lots of love. I know it won't always be pretty and I know there will be days and weeks of madness and chaos and freaking out. But I'm ready for him to be here and join out little family. I'm excited to see what he looks like and to figure out his personality and temperament and his likes and dislikes.

It's just hard to believe that we have a month to go before we are "officially" parents. It seems like yesterday was December 22nd and I stepped out of a late-night shower to see "pregnant" on that test.

He'll be joining our little family before we know it!

Can't wait to meet my little guy!!

Not sure how the pets will act but ... they better behave with a new baby in the house! ;)

... We might be a different story. Behaving: sometimes.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Baby's room is almost done

Just wanted to post a few photos of some of the lovely things baby got for his room recently. It's really starting to come together!

the triangle quilt from Anne

the fish and pebbles crib bedding set from my parents

the navy fish mobile from Astrid

Friday, July 13, 2012

A New Chair for Baby

On Wednesday evening I got a call from Daryl at R + L Carriers asking me to call back and reference such-and-such PRO #. I hadn't been expecting any large items shipped via freight carrier so I thought he must have the wrong number. I quickly looked up the pro # on their website but didn't find any info about the shipper or the contents of the container.

As soon as I left work I called him back and found out:

It was our new glider!! For Baby's room!

I was so so excited! The last large piece of furniture needed to complete his room was on its way to my house at that moment! We worked out the logistics for delivery the next morning. When I got home from work I asked Kevin if the chair had arrived. He said "What chair?" ... I was not surprised by this since he loves to tease, so I went into the baby's room and there it sat. =) He easily installed the back of the chair onto the base, since it had shipped in two pieces. We rearranged the room so we could place the chair where we thought would be best and ... now the room is done! I could not be more excited!!

I had to check the registry to see who gifted us this awesome chair since there wasn't any reference on the package - my sweet friend Jennifer was the gifter; I sent her a picture of the chair in the new room right away so she could see how great it looks. What a sweet and generous gift.

Now all we need is a little bit of artwork, a couple wood shelves and to hang the new quilt and curtains. I'm just so pleased to have all the big stuff out of the way - what a huge relief!!

Here's the room in its new layout with the new chair and its pretty chevron pillow. =) (ignore the tools and junk on the dresser!)

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Baby's First Quilt!

I have posted previously about the small quilts my neighbor made for the baby - small, "tummy time" quilts, also great for going out, in the car, picnicing, travel. She made them in bright rainbow colors with pretty backing and trim. 

I have always liked very colorful things and wanted a full spectrum of color for the Baby and his room so these little quilts are perfect. Kevin put them on the crib after we got it set up; here is a photo of one of them:

Well, she has finished the larger, wall-hanging quilt and came over last night to give it to us, along with his little pillow for the rocker/glider.

She had shown us all the fabrics a few weeks ago and I loved the colors she chose. I had shown her a photo I found on Pinterest as my inspiration piece and she basically replicated it for me! It looks amazing.

Here is the inspiration quilt:

And MY quilt:

The backing on the quilt and pillow are a very dark charcoal gray with a pebbled pattern:

And the front of the pillow is bright orange (!) and light gray chevrons:

Kind of awesome.

Now I can hardly wait to get the chair so we can see how the pillow looks. And we'll have to figure out the final layout we want for the room so we know where to hang the quilt. *so impatient*


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