Overdue

There's something psychological about a due date that makes you feel, once it's come and gone, that you're in a straight jacket.

Of course that is unless you're one of *those* moms who feel great during pregnancy. One of those moms who "glowed." Well...not I. Though I certainly wish that was the case. I'm fully aware of the wonderful miracle that is taking place and the brand new human who will be here (not) soon (enough). But he needs to be miracling in his bassinet now, not my belly. I'm ready for that transition.

As it is I wake up feeling like I spent the night being beaten up. My back is a joke - my ability to stand upright is progressively declining. My ability to smile it away when people ask how I'm doing -- oh and the "are you still pregnant!?" and "are you sure it's just one?!" -- is rapidly disappearing.

Proceed at your own risk.

Swelling: check (ever-present, no reprieve)

Numbness/carpel tunnel: check (though wearing the splint at night helps the pain)

Sleep: fitful, restless. And when I wake up, pure suffering for a few hours as I reacquaint myself with being awake.

Breathing: shallow at best.

Attitude: getting worse by the day.

Hospital bags: packed a month ago.

Baby's room: ready for baby!!



Photo: me at 40 weeks, 08.31.12

35 weeks. 35 days to go.

Today marks the completion of my 35th week and the last 35 days of my pregnancy. The first several months went so slowly; I think I judged my progress on whether or not - or how much - I was showing. Once I started showing - around 4 months I think? - it started going faster. It's just a physical way to assess the progress I suppose and makes it feel like its going by faster? The last couple months in particular have flown.

I've felt so huge and clumsy, tired and achy and crampy. But I've been excited and happy about the "big day" getting closer and closer. It's been something of a roller coaster, emotionally. From day to day I am thrilled (yay! My own sweet little boy to take care of!) and then scared shitless (I'm going to be a mom! What was I thinking?!).

It's a good thing there are 9 months to get ready. All the back and forth has finally stabilized and I feel ready. I'm confident and happy and almost completely ready for a new little human to live in my house.

He has a beautiful bedroom waiting for him and a pretty bed and comfy clothes and lots of love. I know it won't always be pretty and I know there will be days and weeks of madness and chaos and freaking out. But I'm ready for him to be here and join out little family. I'm excited to see what he looks like and to figure out his personality and temperament and his likes and dislikes.

It's just hard to believe that we have a month to go before we are "officially" parents. It seems like yesterday was December 22nd and I stepped out of a late-night shower to see "pregnant" on that test.

He'll be joining our little family before we know it!

Can't wait to meet my little guy!!

Not sure how the pets will act but ... they better behave with a new baby in the house! ;)

... We might be a different story. Behaving: sometimes.